I grew up in South Los Angeles till age 12. In grade school I had several “boyfriends” … just friends. Then my family moved to the San Fernando Valley area 8 miles up into Big Tujunga Canyon in the Angeles National Forest . Loved living in Big T canyon, wonderful house next to a campground and a stream. My 3 sisters and my brother had a blast growing up there.
I was horse crazy and my parents gave in to my desire to have a horse. Misty was not a good choice for a 1st time horse owner, so needed to sell her. Later I worked on a local Arabian horse ranch. So my love of horses was satisfied.
At 16 I moved from horses to boys and I fell for a handsome young man sitting on the front lawn at my High School. Steve and I were never apart much for the next 22 years. The first 13 years we lived together. Then I felt the need to marry… after all we had a house and a life together. We married and spent another 9 years together. I thought that all was well but Steve moved on… I was devastated and mourned for 5 years until a friend said, aren’t you tired of telling that story!
Dance With Me
Dancing became my lover. Country two step, waltz , cha cha, Zydeco, East Coast Swing and West Coast Swing. Loved dancing but didn’t find anyone to date in my dance communities. I bounced from Seattle to Santa Cruz California several times with my job.
November 2001 I began my dating in earnest for the first time in my life. Once answered ads in the newspaper where you left your number in a voice mail box. After several dates I met a very interesting man from Canada. He was a veterinarian working down in the San Jose area. It was an intense hot relationship. Almost immediately he asked to marry me. We married after only 6 months.
The wedding was a rushed even though I had visioned a beautiful celebration of our relationship at a later date. That never happened. In fact I went to counselors several times over the 13 years . Must have read 20 books on relationships and tried everything I could to make the relationship work.
In June 2014 I left the marriage and began my new journey.
PREPARING FOR LOVE
One of my challenges was the lack of physical touch and simple appreciation. My current work offered me lots of appreciation and even hugs yet I longed for a partner and relationship that shared the same desires.
I knew that to create my ideal partnership I would need to open time, space and energy. That meant releasing my many commitments, and physical items that no longer served me. Keeping what was important were favorite friendships and my dancing. I also was eating healthier so that I looked and felt my best.
Stepping out into the world of online dating was scary at first. I wasn’t sure what to expect and some friends had shared warnings… be careful, dating online doesn’t work, they knew someone who had a bad experience blah blah blah. I thought to myself hey this is the new and accepted way of meeting people so just get out there and have some fun.